Yes, that is me...turning 30 tomorrow.I CAN NOT believe it. I have been thinking a lot about 30. Wow. It seems like a milestone. I was just thinking about where I was when I turned 20. I was at Ricks College (having the time of my life, might I add). I had a lot of question marks in my life. My mom had just been diagnosed with Lou Gehrig's disease. I had no boyfriend. I had no kids. I thought maybe I'd go to ISU Dental Hygiene...there wasn't anything too concrete going on.
Fast forward 10 years (which, by the way, seems like a blink)...
My life is pretty constant...not a lot of uncertainty.
Today my day consisted of laundry, dishes, mopping, feeding 3 little hungry mouths, cleaning ketchup off Logan's legs...used for lotion. It is 2:00. I am not showered. I have not brushed my teeth. I feel like a whale. That is what being 9 months pregnant does to a girl. But, I wouldn't change a thing.
Being 30 makes me realize some pretty big things. The biggest is that I am THE MOM. What? I am the all knowing, all loving, all doing person to my kids that my mom was to me. SCARY! I hope that I am up to the task. This is not just for fun. These little boys are depending on ME! Luckily I have an amazing husband who makes up in huge ways for the parts of me that are lacking.
Another thing I am realizing is that once we have this little baby boy in a couple of weeks, I will never be the mother of 3 again. I will always be the thirty something woman responsible for FOUR kids (until I am forty something...I can't even go there). Yikes. I can't think about it too much or I feel a little overwhelmed.
Something else I am realizing is that even though life can be a little monotonous, I love being right where I am. I am very content with the relationships I have. I love my husband. I love my kids. I love my family. I love my good friends. These things make up for the fact that I am sure I will never love laundry, never love dishes, never love mopping...
So, while tomorrow I am turning thirty (I keep telling myself thirty, flirty, and thriving...like from the movie 13 going on 30), I am so happy to be 29 one more day. This year has been good to me. Looking back there has been so many fun and amazing experiences all with the people I love most. It is awesome. So, in a blink, 30 comes. I will be celebrating by not running the half marathon I had trained for and planned for, but by having my fourth little sweet baby boy. Sometimes the best things in life aren't planned...they just happen. I just hope the next 10 years bring me as much happiness as the last 10 have. Don't get me wrong...there have been trials...major trials. But isn't it remarkable that looking back, I can see only the blessings. I hope that when I am 40 I still feel this way!
1 comment:
I wish I could be there to celebrate your birthday. Happy birthday! And I can't wait to meet the newbie. Do you have your pedi scheduled yet?
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